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Get Ready to Laugh Out Loud Hilarious Quotes from the Sneetches

Andreas Pithcsel 13.04 Comment

, it's that the funniest things happen either while we are at work or because of who we work with...or honestly, both! Work can definitely be stressful, whether you're buried under a sea of responsibility, you've got a boss to rival Michael Scott, or your cubicle-mate is a bit of a mouth breather, sometimes you just need a change of perspective to lighten the mood. That's why it's so important to keep your eye out for humor and fun at the office. Some of us who've been working all alone from home since last year have been trying to make the best of it through fun zoom backgrounds and sprucing up our home office spaces. But if you're having an especially rough day, the following quotes will remind you that some quirky things about jobs are just universal and it's helpful to know that you're not the only one out there who's experienced it. It's like an inside joke we can all relate to from at least one job we've ever had in our lives.

“I choose a lazy person to do a hard job, because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it.”

It’s a shame that the only thing a man can do for eight hours a day is work. He can’t eat for eight hours; he can’t drink for eight hours; he can’t make love for eight hours. The only thing a man can do for eight hours is work.”

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“Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They’re about to announce the lottery numbers.”

“When I was 16 I worked in a pet store, and they fired me because... they had three snakes, and one day I braided them.”

“I used to work at McDonald’s making minimum wage. You know what that means? You know what your boss was trying to say? It’s like, ‘Hey if I could pay you less, I would, but it’s against the law.’”Famous funny guy Charlie Chaplin once said, A day without laughter is a day wasted, and we couldn't agree more. Whether you're having a bad day or know someone who could use a little cheering up, laughter really is the best medicine — plus, there are so many ways to tickle your funny bone. Telling corny jokes or watching feel-good comedies is a sure-fire way to add levity to your day, but if you need a quick fix, then we've got tons of funny quotes that are guaranteed to ease the tension and create a little pocket of joy amid life's stresses.

Funny Movie Quotes That Will Make You Laugh

We’ve got hilarious quotes about love, marriage, aging, parenting, friendship, and many more topics that are oh-so relatable and undeniably clever. Grab your favorites for greeting cards, social media captions, or even just to print and hang above your desk to serve as a little reminder that life's not that serious — and we’re all much better off laughing so we don't cry! With quotes from famous comedians like Betty White, Joan Rivers, Lucille Ball, and Phyllis Diller, here are the best laugh-out-loud quotes to enjoy anytime you need a laugh. Looking for more inspiration? Be sure to check out these funny graduation quotes and inspirational quotes about life as well.

4. People say money is not the key to happiness, but I have always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.

7. Sometimes you lie in bed at night and you don't have a single thing to worry about. That always worries me!

Funny Quotes To Make You Laugh Out Loud. Quotesgram

14. Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.

21. Whenever I'm about to do something, I think, 'Would an idiot do that?' And if they would, I do not do that thing.

25. A woman is like a tea bag: You can't tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water.

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26. Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.

27. Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.

30. When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun.'

Funny Inspirational Quotes About Life

34. The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're OK, then it's you. —Rita Mae Brown

36. People waste their time pondering whether a glass is half empty or half full. Me, I just drink whatever's in the glass.

38. Don't waste so much time thinking about how much you weigh. There is no more mind-numbing, boring, idiotic, self-destructive diversion from the fun of living.

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47. You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there. —George Burns

50. Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet service to see who they really are.

56. The best way to get most husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they're too old to do it.

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57. As a man in a relationship, you have a simple choice. You can either be right, or you can be happy.

74. Be wise, because the world needs wisdom. If you cannot be wise, pretend to be someone who is wise, and then just behave like they would.

75. Follow your passion, stay true to yourself, never follow someone else's path unless you're in the woods and you're lost and you see a path then by all means you should follow that.

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79. The lord gave us two ends: One to sit on and the other to think with. Success depends on which one we use the most.

89. An office is a place to live life to the fullest, to the max. An office is a place where dreams come true.

93. I hate housework. You make the beds, you wash the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again.

Laugh Out Loud Funny Love Quotes To Tickle Your Fancy

, TODAY and countless other online and print outlets. Alesandra has a masters degree in journalism with an emphasis on cultural reporting and criticism from NYU, and a bachelor’s degree from UC Berkeley. An avid traveler, she trots the globe with her husband and their twins.

Corinne Sullivan is a digital writer and editor who covers a variety of beats, including lifestyle, entertainment, relationships, holidays and more. She is also the author of the 2018 novel Indecent.

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8 Trauma Bonding Quotes to Help You Reconnect and Relax

Andreas Pithcsel 23.48 Comment

Being in a toxic relationship is a lot like walking on the tightrope 6 feet high up the ground. Any second, you can slip and fall.

Getting out of an abusive relationship is like walking backward on the same tightrope. It won’t not easy, and the healing won’t be linear. But you are on the way finding yourself back.

So here is a list of healing quotes to strengthen your faith walking out of a toxic relationship. Trust the process. You will get there.

Healing Quotes To Leave And Recover From Toxic Relationships

Sometimes you need to stop seeing the good in people and start seeing what they show you. It took letting go to realize that I was holding onto nothing. – r.h.sin

I walked away because you were too busy finding faults in me and I was busy overlooking yours. Love is worth fighting for, but not if you are the only one fighting.

Sometimes you need to forget how you feel and think of what you deserve. Whoever loves you will not make you feel unlovable. In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you. – Buddha

Top Domestic Violence Quotes

No reason to stay is a good reason to go. Don’t let the heart that didn’t love you keep you away from the one that will.

You are not a rehabilitation center for badly raised men. It is not your job to fix him, change him, parent him. You want a partner, not a project.

Forgive others not because they deserve forgiveness but because you deserve peace. – Jonathan Lockwood Huie Healing quotes to be patient Healing doesn’t mean the damage never existed. It means it no longer controls us.

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You are a wolf. No need to howl over the loss of weak men incapable of accepting you. – r.h.sin Time heals all wounds.

If you are going through hell, keep going. Why would you stop in hell? – Steve Harvey When you tell your story and it doesn’t make you cry, that’s when you know you’ve healed.

Sometimes the person you want most is the one you’ll be better without. Sometimes you have to be done. Not mad. Not upset. Just done.

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Sometimes being alone in life is better than being surrounded by half-ass people. Healing quotes to move forward Sometimes you need to die a little inside to reborn and thrive.

Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it. – Helen Keller Wisdom is often found in pain. You’ve survived the worst. You’ll survive the recovery. There is no pain without purpose.

It may take some time to heal from a narcissistic relationship. You may feel like part of your soul is taken away. But things fall apart so better things will come together.

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The Universe is not trying to break you. It’s trying to wake you up, so you’ll see what’s real and what’s worth fighting for.

I am my light at the end of the tunnel. The Universe is my support system. It’s me versus my past. And I will win. I have the power to heal.

When I look back on my life, I see pain, mistakes and heartache. When I look in the mirror, I see strength, learned lessons, and pride in myself. I am brave enough to open a new chapter. I am taking my time, and I am healing. I know my worth. Do these healing quotes resonate with you?

What To Do When You're Lonely

So here are the healing quotes to quit a toxic relationship and to find your strength back. If you are in need, talk to a friend or a therapist. Help is also on the line .The below article will provide you with the best trauma quotes. People who go through trauma-related incidents go through depression, confusion, anxiety, stress, sadness, exhaustion, and many more in their life. It can be overbearing some of the time, in those times they look for people to help them with this trauma. Sometimes people will be unable to hold a rational conversation without getting an anxiety disorder. Symptoms like these are commonplace in a traumatic person. They will have a hard time coming up with a response to a question. Trauma takes a huge toll on a person, it brings harm to a person’s spiritual, personal life, emotional wellbeing, and sometimes physical harm.

Here are some of the best trauma quotes from various authors. Getting a professional perspective on things will always make people know about the world and understand themselves better. The author who has gone through the phase in their life will have better insight to offer to people who are going through it with these insightful and helpful trauma quotes. That is the reason why people focus on what they have to say, it is the deep meaning that makes people read about trauma quotes or any sentences written by the people who have been through the trauma period in their lives.

If a person is suffering from any sort of trauma-related accidents in their life. Then it is a wiser move to take them to a therapist for a proper control or grip in their life. Trauma therapists are prepared to handle everything that a traumatic person goes through every single day. They will have the proper tools and required information for the people who are experiencing trauma for the first time in their life, as they won’t know how to cope with these feelings.

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Trauma Therapists will do their best to understand the person rather than forcing themselves in. They will teach the trauma patient the strategies that they will need to apply it in real life. These strategies will help the person to express themselves without feeling confused or with a non-response. They will also provide necessary tools to improve the overall behavior in a person.

Trauma Therapist is a form of psychotherapy that helps people to connect with themselves. The professional therapist will always help you to pick up what you lost in life. As they will have the experience and the guidelines to give you proper steps to follow to achieve something that you want. They often fix many conflicts that pop up in marriages, couples, and families.

If you are suffering from any traumatic issues in your life, it is better to talk about it with others rather than hiding it from the people. Therapy is a perfect way to express your inner feelings without feeling any shame or fear.

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When you open the bottle, talk about the things that you have been hidden away forever, only then you will start putting the piece of your life back together, and see a new vision of life that you never thought about achieving.

Here are some of the effective trauma quotes that you can follow in your life. All of them carry deeper insight to life that can help you or your friend to gain a different vision in the mind. each one of them tells a vision of what life should be about. The process of healing will always start with a clear mind and thinking, and these trauma quotes tend to offer exactly that to the reader. Feel free to share them with your friends who are suffering from a traumatic period in their life. You can use trauma quotes to make them feel better.

It is a small step, but it is also an effective step that you can take towards the people who are feeling lonely and depressed in their life. It is often the small step that turns into a big reason for the people to turn to the other side. A helping hand is all that they need to go forward in their life. You can use the trauma quotes mentioned below to move them forward.

Inspirational Quotes & Thoughtful Words

Here are some of the trauma quotes images that you can set for your friends and family members who are going through difficult phases in their life.

“If someone has hurt you, take some time to try to understand them – their traumas, their mood, etc. Don’t do this to simply find excuses for them. Do it to help you to heal – to de-personalize the pain. When you seek compassion for them, you wind up having more compassion for yourself too.” – Karen Salmansohn [NS ]

These are some of the memorable trauma quotes Tumblr. Feel free to use them with your friends and click on the link to find more images about the subject.

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I worry so much that this anger will never dissipate and that it will never get better. I don’t want to be so consumed by it all the time, and I want to control it, but it’s almost been a year now, and I still just burn with it every single day. – Faithfully Yours[T1 ]

Traumatic events, by definition, overwhelm our ability to cope. When the mind becomes flooded with emotion, a circuit breaker is thrown that allows us to survive the experience fairly intact, that is, without becoming psychotic or frying out one of the brain centers. The cost of this blown circuit

Youll Be Amazed After Reading These Impactful Master Splinter Quotes

Andreas Pithcsel 18.48 Comment

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“The manner in which we perform even the most mundane acts is a statement of who we are. We resemble our performance and our performance resembles us.”

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. The highly honored martial arts expert, who also holds doctorates in martial arts philosophy and martial arts science, seeks to help people achieve the balance in life that we all seek. Many feel such equilibrium is elusive. Hamilton seeks to demonstrate how it can be readily achieved and maintained with a little discipline and determination.

Roger B. Hamilton hasn’t had the ideal life, particularly after he lost his father in an accident when he was a mere nine years old. Losing a beloved parent and role model is tough at any age. As an adult, he was struck physically by a speeding truck that caused him serious injury. This life-altering accident gave him time to reflect on his identity and purpose. Instead of letting life circumstances get him down, he has embraced his challenges and losses. This important personal inventory and self-reflection help him to be a better father to his two boys, and a mentor to youths from all over. His desire to be cerebral as well as visceral kicked him into gear to develop both his mind and body to achieve balance. Such inspiration drives him to do his best across the board.

His martial arts business ventures began after renovating and converting his home garage into a Dojo, which eventually became the highly revered Hamilton Martial Arts Academy in Brentwood. Martial arts classes became available for all ages, as well as kickboxing, wrestling, and yoga programs. Families were encouraged to take classes together. Through teaching his students self-discipline and personal balance with martial arts as a foundation, he has made a significant difference in the lives of hundreds, if not thousands of people.

Oh, By The Way

Book focuses on the connection between family, work, and the martial arts. Readers go through the process of examining their own lives to determine what their own personal goals are. Martial arts philosophy guides the journey, although it isn’t required that readers are martial arts practitioners or maintain the physical aspect of the practice. The important focus is on achieving balance in life.

To illustrate the path, he includes numerous anecdotes and photographs of success from which readers can glean useful tips. The next step is to apply these ideals in their lives, to become the best that they can be.

“After 40 years of wrestling, boxing and karate training, as well as business and parenting, I still get excited about this personal development stuff, ” said Sensei Hamilton, “Mine is a blessed life.”Looking for planning quotes to add to your bullet journal or just be inspired? Check out my favorite famous quotes about planning.

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Well, that is because the way we think about ourselves and life and what we think is possible for us to achieve will actually determine the path that will come our way.

I have discussed it more in-depth in my Vision Board article explaining why the mind is actually the reality and that when you improve the quality of your thoughts you have the ability to change the quality of your life too, sometimes instantly.

Words are very powerful, they can touch us, make us smile, laugh or cry. That is why having positive thoughts and a feeling of gratitudeis wonderful for our overall well-being, and it goes much deeper than most people realize.

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Just know that you do have control over your thoughts even in the hardest circumstances so nurture them with motivation words that will help the stars align and get you to the results you want.

So today I have a few positive words and quotes about planning and preparation because after all we are all planners and dedicated to leading a more successful and productive life.

It is handy to keep a few of these uplifting planning quotes in your bullet journal or planner. If you are just starting on your bullet journal, getting a bit overwhelmed by it, or noticing a shift in your positive thoughts simply check back on your quote pages for a quick boost on your mood.

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This is my favorite quote about planning because of how much truth it speaks. When I take the time to plan my week I am so much more productive.

If you are looking for inspirational quotes about planning this one will be a nice addition to your bullet journal pages. It is all about priorities.

This is such a good planning quote by Eleanor Roosevelt. It takes the same time and energy to wish and to plan, choose wisely what you do.

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I like how this poor planning quote reminds us that not every plan goes as planned but the goals can be achieved with a new plan.

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I really likes the beautiful quotes so much.More especially the one that saidif the plans doesn't work change the planning not the goal.

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Love Quotes Just For Him

Andreas Pithcsel 04.53 Comment

If you are looking for love quotes just for him you’ve come to the right place. We have 31 images about love quotes just for him including images, pictures, photos, wallpapers, and more. In these page, we also have variety of images available. Such as png, jpg, animated gifs, pic art, logo, black and white, transparent, etc.

Love Quotes For Him Journey

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If you are looking for love quotes for him journey you’ve come to the right place. We have 24 images about love quotes for him journey including images, pictures, photos, wallpapers, and more. In these page, we also have variety of images available. Such as png, jpg, animated gifs, pic art, logo, black and white, transparent, etc.

Love Quotes To Make Him Jealous

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If you are looking for love quotes to make him jealous you’ve come to the right place. We have 27 images about love quotes to make him jealous including images, pictures, photos, wallpapers, and more. In these page, we also have variety of images available. Such as png, jpg, animated gifs, pic art, logo, black and white, transparent, etc.

Love Quotes For Him Saying Good Morning

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